(This is a recycled post, if you have read this before, pardon me! The truth is - my thoughts are still not very organized after fighting with the cold bug. The other truth is, I think this article worth a re-read. Believe me, read on.)
The first time I “celebrated” Valentine’s Day was when Rachel suggested that daddy and mummy went for a Valentine Candle Light dinner while she looked after Chris. She was then 6 and Chris, 1.
We did not go for a candle light dinner. My significant other bought some chocolates. Chocolates has never been my favourite, so the father-daughter team finished all. For that thoughtful suggestion of a romantic night for daddy and mummy, Rachel was rewarded with chocolates. And from that day on, she receives chocolate surprises now and then from daddy.
Over the years, my significant other would buy some gifts to show his love and affection.
One year, he went to England and came back with two skirts and two blouses from Marks & Spencer (his favourite shopping place). It was the first time he bought clothes for me. It turned out to be disastrous. He bought three sizes bigger. While I was shocked, I also thought that he would not mind me growing another three sizes bigger even when I am already over-sized. That warmed my heart. I still keep the clothes. Perhaps one day, I would be able to wear that!
Another year, he went to England again and came back with shoes also two sizes bigger. It took me quite a while to find the Cinderella to fit the shoes and gave them away. It was not cheap. I could not keep the leather shoes hoping that one day my feet would grow bigger! I jokingly told him that it was lucky that I could not wear or I would have “walked out of his life”!
Other years, he bought pearl necklace, chocolates, candies …. but no roses yet. Other times if he did not pick up any present, he would give a hug. Then the two children would always go, “Yeah! Me next!”
Such were the fun of Valentine’s Day. However, I am romantically impaired. All the roses around the feet are transparent. I have never been attracted to them. All the candlelight set dinners are too expensive to waste money during valentine day. My gifts are limited to books, cards, CDs, cross-stitches I made and home-cook food. I am more a practical person.
I do not like to stick to routine. Or perhaps, I always do the opposite. When everyone is having new clothes for new year, I wear the usual clothes. When everyone is going for new hairstyle, there has never been a time that I change to a new hairstyle for new year. So, giving gifts on Valentine’s Day is definitely out of question.
What’s so special about Valentine’s Day this year then?
Yeah, it’s my blog’s anniversary!
It was last year (now should read four years) I started this blog. I remember writing about a young charming journalist believing that the young bud in a vase on her table would blossom. Even when her colleague laughed at her that no beautiful flower would come from the bud, she insisted that within every bud there is a rose.
I do not know whether the young bud on her table blossomed later. But, over the year, this young journalist blossoms! She has won many prizes over the past year. She has written many delightful and touching articles that bring out the good in everything she has explored. The rose within her has blossomed many times over.
There is this journalist who suffers from insomnia for many years. For several years, he could never attend my morning meeting. Over the year, with much coaching and encouragement, he has been making presence at my morning meeting regularly and contributing ideas. He has made tremendous improvement in his work winning many prizes.
Yes, within every soul there is a rose … there is always something good in store in someone. It only takes love and living to nurture that good and bring it out.
Valentine’s Day is about living together in the Lord in a loving marriage relationship for husbands and wives. It is about a loving lifestyle of intentional, sacrificial commitment to each other, whether lovers, husbands and wives, friends and community members. It is also about loving oneself, nurturing the good in oneself.
C.S. Lewis talks about the event of falling in love in his book, The Four Loves. He says,
In one high bound it has overleaped the massive all of our selfhood; it has made appetite itself altruistic, tossed personal happiness aside as a triviality and planted the interests of another in the centre of our being.
That really means love another person. It’s more than roses, chocolates, cakes, candlelight dinner, diamonds ….. It’s more than the ability to accept the oversized dresses and shoes with a laugh.
We live in days of tremendous personal isolation, insulation and little tolerance. Demonstrations of affection are sadly lacking. The danger most of us face is showing too little rather than too much affection and have no commitment in any relationship.
Loving involves much more than making them happy on Valentine’s Day, it involves a commitment that can surmount any hurdle, a commitment that can survive any sorrow, a commitment that will last forever. Husbands and wives who give gifts to each on Valentine’s Day but are untrue to one another would not be people who know what love is all about. Husband and wives who are good at bringing momentary happiness but fail to stay committed over the long term would not be people who know what love is really all about.
Remember how C.S. Lewis defined what it means to fall in love? It is relationship marked by the kind of selflessness, altruism and concern for others. Such relationships are all humanly impossible.
Yes, it is humanly impossible apart from the grace of God at work among us, changing us.
Be my V. A. L. E. T. I. N. E, all year long.
V for my venture into the blogging world trying to make some sense in every day’s life issues
A for the abundance of blessings from above and from friends and friends in this blogging world
L for the laughter, love and labour
E for the encouragement throughout the year
N for the nurture
T for the time spent exchanging conversations
I for making me feel important
N for meeting my every needs
E for empathizing with me in many situations
From your Valentine!
(Footnote: This blog template shall be for Valentine only. I shall switch back and the proper side-bars with my daily read will appear! Your thoughts count.)
The first time I “celebrated” Valentine’s Day was when Rachel suggested that daddy and mummy went for a Valentine Candle Light dinner while she looked after Chris. She was then 6 and Chris, 1.
We did not go for a candle light dinner. My significant other bought some chocolates. Chocolates has never been my favourite, so the father-daughter team finished all. For that thoughtful suggestion of a romantic night for daddy and mummy, Rachel was rewarded with chocolates. And from that day on, she receives chocolate surprises now and then from daddy.
Over the years, my significant other would buy some gifts to show his love and affection.
One year, he went to England and came back with two skirts and two blouses from Marks & Spencer (his favourite shopping place). It was the first time he bought clothes for me. It turned out to be disastrous. He bought three sizes bigger. While I was shocked, I also thought that he would not mind me growing another three sizes bigger even when I am already over-sized. That warmed my heart. I still keep the clothes. Perhaps one day, I would be able to wear that!
Another year, he went to England again and came back with shoes also two sizes bigger. It took me quite a while to find the Cinderella to fit the shoes and gave them away. It was not cheap. I could not keep the leather shoes hoping that one day my feet would grow bigger! I jokingly told him that it was lucky that I could not wear or I would have “walked out of his life”!
Other years, he bought pearl necklace, chocolates, candies …. but no roses yet. Other times if he did not pick up any present, he would give a hug. Then the two children would always go, “Yeah! Me next!”
Such were the fun of Valentine’s Day. However, I am romantically impaired. All the roses around the feet are transparent. I have never been attracted to them. All the candlelight set dinners are too expensive to waste money during valentine day. My gifts are limited to books, cards, CDs, cross-stitches I made and home-cook food. I am more a practical person.
I do not like to stick to routine. Or perhaps, I always do the opposite. When everyone is having new clothes for new year, I wear the usual clothes. When everyone is going for new hairstyle, there has never been a time that I change to a new hairstyle for new year. So, giving gifts on Valentine’s Day is definitely out of question.
What’s so special about Valentine’s Day this year then?
Yeah, it’s my blog’s anniversary!
It was last year (now should read four years) I started this blog. I remember writing about a young charming journalist believing that the young bud in a vase on her table would blossom. Even when her colleague laughed at her that no beautiful flower would come from the bud, she insisted that within every bud there is a rose.
I do not know whether the young bud on her table blossomed later. But, over the year, this young journalist blossoms! She has won many prizes over the past year. She has written many delightful and touching articles that bring out the good in everything she has explored. The rose within her has blossomed many times over.
There is this journalist who suffers from insomnia for many years. For several years, he could never attend my morning meeting. Over the year, with much coaching and encouragement, he has been making presence at my morning meeting regularly and contributing ideas. He has made tremendous improvement in his work winning many prizes.
Yes, within every soul there is a rose … there is always something good in store in someone. It only takes love and living to nurture that good and bring it out.
Valentine’s Day is about living together in the Lord in a loving marriage relationship for husbands and wives. It is about a loving lifestyle of intentional, sacrificial commitment to each other, whether lovers, husbands and wives, friends and community members. It is also about loving oneself, nurturing the good in oneself.
C.S. Lewis talks about the event of falling in love in his book, The Four Loves. He says,
In one high bound it has overleaped the massive all of our selfhood; it has made appetite itself altruistic, tossed personal happiness aside as a triviality and planted the interests of another in the centre of our being.
That really means love another person. It’s more than roses, chocolates, cakes, candlelight dinner, diamonds ….. It’s more than the ability to accept the oversized dresses and shoes with a laugh.
We live in days of tremendous personal isolation, insulation and little tolerance. Demonstrations of affection are sadly lacking. The danger most of us face is showing too little rather than too much affection and have no commitment in any relationship.
Loving involves much more than making them happy on Valentine’s Day, it involves a commitment that can surmount any hurdle, a commitment that can survive any sorrow, a commitment that will last forever. Husbands and wives who give gifts to each on Valentine’s Day but are untrue to one another would not be people who know what love is all about. Husband and wives who are good at bringing momentary happiness but fail to stay committed over the long term would not be people who know what love is really all about.
Remember how C.S. Lewis defined what it means to fall in love? It is relationship marked by the kind of selflessness, altruism and concern for others. Such relationships are all humanly impossible.
Yes, it is humanly impossible apart from the grace of God at work among us, changing us.
Be my V. A. L. E. T. I. N. E, all year long.
V for my venture into the blogging world trying to make some sense in every day’s life issues
A for the abundance of blessings from above and from friends and friends in this blogging world
L for the laughter, love and labour
E for the encouragement throughout the year
N for the nurture
T for the time spent exchanging conversations
I for making me feel important
N for meeting my every needs
E for empathizing with me in many situations
From your Valentine!
(Footnote: This blog template shall be for Valentine only. I shall switch back and the proper side-bars with my daily read will appear! Your thoughts count.)
7 comments:
HAHAHA! "Romantically impaired"?!! First time I've read the term... and it's funny because that would describe most men perfectly well, but women? You? You are so funny Yan.
Unlike you, I was born a hopeless romantic at heart. Of course, my ideas and ideals on love has changed alot over the years, and just like you, practicality overwrites fantasy alot of the time.
I can't think of anything you could do with the oversized shoes except to give it away but you could alter those oversized dresses. Give it a contemporary look by altering the design, e.g cutting to short sleeves if it's long, V-neck if it's round, shortening it slightly etc... An oversized dress is easier to work with than one that's too small, that's for sure. *grins*
I enjoyed reading your take on what loving a person involves, and especially agree that an "intentional sacrificial commitment to each other" is the ultimate key to a successful relationship.
Happy Valentine's Day to you and yours, Yan.
A happy Valentine's to you!!
Never mind those gifts never fit. As long as the two of you fit one another, thats more impt!
i oways buy gifts for Mrs BB that oways ends up in some closet some where. she oways scolds me for buying but after reading yr post, perhaps she jus might appreciate them after all secretly :) anyway i console myself that way :)
Happy BlogAnniversary Yan. Hope you have a wonderful day together, however romantic or not it may be! ;)
Congrats on the anniversary of your blog. Mine will be next month...and Happy lifelong Valentine's Day!!! I don't bother about it...over-commercialised, too expensive! Love does not equal expensive gifts and dinners.....
Happy Valentine's and happy blogovesary, Yan! Thanks for your reminder about commitment above all else, and I also like your acrostic for Valentine! God bless the wonderful marriage/convenant you and your husband have, and you know, in your special ways, you are romantic too! =)
Lovely and loving couple even after so many years of marriage. Why Valentine without S? Isn't "S" another important factor in maintaining a good relationship/marriage?
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